hey guys,
keep thinking about granddaddy, sad that he's not doing very well health-wise.
be SURE to tell linda, erik, and chad that he's going down-hill so that they can call him and say anything that needs to be said. Not that there probably is, but its nice to have the choice.
Love you,
Ellie
Email from Faffy to Ellie:
Hi, Ellie,
Nice that you are thinking of GD. Unfortunately, I do not think he is able now to carry on a telephone conversation. He can hardly communicate even in person. Most likely will go on Hospice care regimen this week. Hi to all.
Love,
Pop
Email from Ellie to Faffy:
Hey pop. Sad to hear that. I love you. Let's skype soon.
Love,
Ellie
Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:
it's a really good idea--everyone knows except Erik--I'll remind pop to call him tomorrow.
However, it's probably a bit late. I was kicking myself for not telling G'daddy how much he's meant to me before he got so sick he probably can't understand. I tried to say a couple things to him this visit but he didn't respond. Don't know if he even heard, or maybe it just didn't compute, or maybe he was embarrassed. Anyway, I keep doing that over and over and over---not letting people know how special they are until it's way too late.
It IS sad, but mostly for us. He's had a long, productive, successful life, and his body is giving out. It's mostly for us that it's hard. I just wish we could be around him when he dies, instead of him passing on alone. It won't matter to him, I don't think (and neither does pop) but it matters to me--a lot.
We asked his doctor to get Hospice involved--they're REALLY good at estimating how long people have to live, and ensuring that they're comfortable and at peace at the end of life, so I'm hopeful they'll let us know in time.
We love you honey.
Mama
Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey):
It might still nice to have a conversation, to say you love him, even if you dont get to say anything meaningful you get to think it and express it in small ways. just saying "i love you" and really, really meaning it is a good thing. i think erik has made a real effort to have his kids get to know gdaddy, im sure they would like to talk with him.
i keep thinking about him dying alone, too. really sad. :(
thats the problem with living far apart.... i wish we'd moved gdaddy to seattle when he first moved out of the house. then we could go see him a lot more easily. oh well. live and learn.
i agree that it wont matter to gdaddy, but its just not what he deserves. he has a lot of family and he has been really good to all of us. :(
i know everybody is busy... but if it were MY faffy (or monkey) i wouldnt be okay with the situation. of course, you guys are different people - i dont think you would live so far away from all of us, you're not as attached to a house/place as gdaddy. (but even if you were i would have moved you closer.) just sayin....
love you,
ellie
Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:
I am determined to make it as easy as possible for you guys when it comes to situations like this. Whenever we mentioned to those guys (when you guys were little) the possibility of moving to west coast, they'd poo-poo it, and say things like,"we never want to be a burden on our kids". As if worrying about your parents, and missing them, and feeling terribly guilty for having to choose between your career and kids vs caring for your parents isn't at all a burden! Anyway, we'll move anywhere to make it easier for you guys I promise.
I too wish we had insisted on moving him to Seattle when he had to move out of house too. However, I think he would've refused then. He's pretty stubborn, plus he has a lot of strong connections there. We will never know I guess.
Gotta go night night. You too.
Love you
Mama
