Videos

Bran Muffins

Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey):

mom keep forgetting to tell you - teddy LOVE LOVE LOVES bran muffins! he gets really excited when he sees them and likes to hold the muffin in his hand by himself and plunge his little face in.

:)


Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:

That's funny. Especially because you LOVED them too--at exactly the same age.

You Okay?

Email from Dan to Ellie:

you okay?  havent heard from you......
hope everythings alright
love you!
-dan


Email from Ellie to Dan:

hey love - just got this. my phone was on silent. dont wanna call you in case you're asleep even though you're probably not. i was worried about you too! im silly...
i miss you and am studying because i cant sleep.
goin to sleep soon though. but feel free to call me ANYTIME.

love you LOTS.

Anyhoo

Email from Dan to Ellie:

Ellie love,
Here's my schedule for next month.  Lots of call but should be okay.  I don't know if it's home call or hospital call... I think it's hospital call.
Anyhoo.  Love you!
-Dan

Videos

Video

Video

I Love You, and Other Stuff

Email from Dan to Ellie:

Hi!  I forgot my phone today.  FYI. 

Hope you're having a peachy day.  I love the weather today!

Umm... yeah well I love you and I'm gunna cook for you again.  How bout that huh?  Something yummy and rainy-day-ish I think.  A soup of some sort.

Anyhoo by now and Ill call you when I'm off.

Hey whats your phone number?

Love you forevs and evs,

D

Email from Ellie to Dan:

Love you the most. XXX-XXX-XXXX. Unless you were just teasing. Love you so.

No Peeking!

Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:

Hey.
Just wanted you to know I just bought some stuff for Teddy and had them sent to your address. They're for Xmas, should be gift wrapped, but if not, NO PEEKING!!!! :)
love you lots
Mama


Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey) and Dan:

aw, thats cute. dont worry, i wont let TEDDY peek. ;)

dan and i will also try to restrain ourselves...


Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie and Dan:

I just want to see your reaction--Teddy could care less about clothed, I'm sure. 

Mamee

Havn Fun at Costco

Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey):

Teddy havn fun with Eva at Costco.

Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:

Awwww, I miss him. He's so dang cute. How are things going? We're in chatta right now. Gdaddy is ding great. Plan on reunion when he turns 100...


Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey):

How old is he now? And what day is his bday?


Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:

Unfortunately his b'day is not summertime--January 24, 1914. In 2014 it falls on a Friday. Maybe you guys could take a long weekend. I don't want to plan too much--I'm superstitious.

Gosh Darn It

Email from Ellie to Dan:

gosh darn it, i love you!

sorry i intercepted you this morning. i didnt mean to. you're the nicest. i like law school. i can write in short sentences. woo hoo!!!

love youuuuu!!!

- your wifey (did i ever tell you kristina martin thought "wifey" was a porn reference and inherently dirty?)


Email from Dan to Ellie:

Hey baby.  Love you n miss you n hope you havin a great day.

We cuddled last night.  mmmm.

Chewbacca (the new cat) was very cuddly with me this morning.  S(he) helped me get ready for work.
Anyways i cant wait to see you tonight.  bye love.

Hello From Plastic Surgery Clinic

Email from Dan to Ellie:

hello from plastic surgery clinic.  shoot me in the face!

jk.  im having an okay day just really really bored. 

i love you eternally.

Videos

Dirty Dishes Poems

Email from Ellie to Dan, Mom (Monkey), and Faffy:

I was looking for dirty dishes poems and found a picture of a note above an office sink, saying the following:

Soaking cup haiku

Dried flecks of cat food
Circling the rim of the cup
Oh - it's your oatmeal.

I decided to write my own poem about dishes, thought you guys might like it. :)

Oh, how I wishes we didn't have to wash the dishes!
But stuck in the sink, dishes stack and stack and stink.
So, quick! Scrub them clean, and make them really gleam!
Put them in the washer, or scrub them with a clother!
And our wishes for clean dishes will soon come true.


Email from Dan to Ellie:

I chuckled.

I Love Being Auntie Leslie!

Email from Leslie to Ellie:

we had such a wonderful time in p-town. we love you and your beautiful fam. i love being auntie leslie! i'm so excited to watch theo grow up. and hopefully be a big bro to our little ones once we get going on that project. have a wonderful summer and a great time at law school (you're going to rock it!). and i'll send you some steamy vampire chapters as soon as they materialize.

mwah! 

les

Email from Ellie to Leslie:

I miss you guys already. Keep us updated on Norway.

Love much,
Ellie, dan, and tator tot

Videos

LOVE

Email from Leslie to Ellie:

hey eldawg,

still planning on coming down for the fair sunday?

you could stay here sunday night if you want. the bedroom is open!

or maybe you wanted to come down sat? courtney and her bf doug are coming for the fair saturday and spending the night sat night so it will be more crowded here then but we could put you in the bedroom (for real this time! cuz ch and doug could be in the office and me and adam are happy to be in the living room). anyway, courtney and doug are leaving early sun (like 8am). 

adam and i are going to the fair both sat and sun. so whenever works for you!! hope you can come! and we're definitely planning on coming up to your place the weekend after. woot woot!

LOVE

les

Email from Ellie to Leslie:

Hi Les!

Teddy and I will probably drive up Sunday morning, spend the night, and then take off Monday. I think that would be a lot of fun. :)

glad you guys are coming up the following weekend. woot woot!

LOVE LOVE LOOOOVVVVVVE,

Ellie

A Rare Find

Email from Leslie:

Ellie! i love you so. you are such a rare find. it was wonderful seeing you sat. it's still doesn't feel real that you live just two hours away and can just appear at our house like that. what a miracle! 

thanks for amber's info. we should definitely all get together again for country fair. we are off to crater lake today. 

talk to you/see you soon!!!

I Never Want Anything Bad to Happen to You

Email from Dan to Ellie:

i miss you both sososososossoossos much.  I'm glad you had a good trip and I'm glad you got to see Les before she left and i'm glad you're home safe.

Last night we took care of a little 4 year boy who fell out of a 2 story window and is probably going to be braindead forever.  I never wanted to hold Theo as much as I did when I saw that little boy lying there with his parents next to him when we had to tell them how bad it was.  I also haven't had to hold back tears so hard in the hospital in a long time.

I never want anything bad to happen to either of you.

I love you very much.  You know that.  Please tell Teddy that I love him too and give him a big ol kiss for me.

You be a good girl okay?  Drive safe and make sury teddy is buckled up tight.

Hope you have a nice day/evening/night/morning!

LOVE YOU FOREVER AND EVER

-dan

Email from Ellie to Dan:

Hey love of my life,

Teddy is safe and asleep in his crib. I gave him lots of hugs and kisses from you earlier today.

That's a horrible story. In a way, I'm glad you're witnessing it - it will make you one heck of a careful daddy, knowing that stuff happens. Is that sick and awful of me? Im not heartless... I choked up just reading about it! I just never ever ever want anything like that to happen to our little man. He is so perfect.

I love you IMMENSELY forever n ever and ever, you are the light and love of my life. The two of us will keep Teddy safe. I figure our main job (more important than all of our other jobs) is to keep him safe until he's 18.

you are my honey. you know how much i love you? i hope you do. im fulla love for my favorite danda panda manda man.

kisses from me and slobbery kisses from theo,

ellie and teddy burr

Can't Wait To See You

Email from Leslie to Ellie:

hey lady,

i so want to hang with you and your lovely family! you should definitely come to the country fair - we're planning on going sunday july 11th - courtney and her boyfriend might come down too. AND our neighbors specifically told me to invite you (because i was talking about you and dan and theo and how wonderful you all are) to their favorites party which is this huge crazy party they have every year. it's sat june 26th - starts at five - and people are supposed to bring their favorite things (last year a massage therapist brought her massage chair and gave free massages, people bring favorite foods, favorite drinks, a comedian guy is going to do some stand up - and there will be live music). It will be a bit crazy because adam's whole family is going to be here - eek! and my parents too. they probably won't stay for much of the party but both sets of parents get into eugene that day and adam's family (5 people) are staying at our house (for a week and a half!). SO. 

i really want to see your place! i don't think we can make it up until july 17-18-19 ish but can we plan on that? (Adam's got a race the same evening as that concert unfortunately!) 

we'll be back in eugene around the first of the year and back in seattle a little earlier - the 20th of dec - in case you guys are in seattle for the holidays too!

can't wait to see you.

love

les

Moving Out of Our First Home

Email from Ellie to Landlady:

Hello!

Sad to be moving out of our first home as a married couple, and Theo's first home ever. You have been an amazing landlady! Thank you so much.

We were hoping you would do a walk-through before we're completely out of 3014. We're going to be out by June 1st, for sure. We've already moved all of our furniture down to Portland and are camping out in our apartment until then. :)

Monday the 24th or Tuesday the 25th would be best for us, anytime of day or evening. Are you free one of those days for a walk-through?

Thanks again,

Ellie, Dan, and Theo

Email from Landlady to Ellie:

Ellie,
You have been there for 3 years! and Theo was our first and only baby - just what that old building longed for.
I have greatly appreciated you all as well.  Thanks for your help in getting the apt rented - and your continued willingness to accommodate.  The 24th looks good for me.  At this point I am completely flexible.

Trip to SanFran

Email from Ellie to Hayley:

we were going to SURPRISE you on your birthday, but i guess thats shot now. silly dan.

we're all REALLY excited to see you!!

:)

Email from Hayley to Ellie:

So excited to see you guys and li'l theosaurus rex -- Dan told me last night how he "loves guacamole" now...we have been dying over it ever since!

xoxo
Hay

Hey Shweetie

Email from Ellie to Dan:

Hey shweetie,

I love you so! Thanks for your text, I appreciate the update. We're doing GREAT out here. Weather has been so incredible, shorts and t-shirts weather. Baby has been happy and chipper. Mom got him one of those exersaucers they have at 24 hour fitness, we're gonna bring it back to Portland with us.

we got some oregon muscat and had baby in the hot tub with us! (at 100 degrees) he LOVED it, was adorable. stood up on the ledge with me supporting him and bounced and bounced. we blew on his face and put him briefly underwater three times, just dunked him in, and he did great! no crying, no choking. cant wait to teach him to swim this summer.

yacht club last night was awesome food. its twenty bucks a head all you can eat on tuesday nights, with prime rib, almond encrusted yellow curry mahi mahi, homemade salad dressing, homemade ice cream, and lots of other yummies. next time you're in seattle we'll have to go there. brought back lots of happy memories and thoughts of you, since last time i was there was the wedding.

we're missin you... so glad you liked your letters from me and theo. im really happy that you ended up still doing the wilderness medicine trips, especially if you're learning good stuff!

love ya,

ellie

Works For Me

Email from Ellie to Erica:

my mom found a book "100 questions for kids" that i'd filled out when i was 8. in response to one question, "what would you say to someone who was sad?" i answered "hang out with friends and play lots of cool sports like soccer." made me laugh.


Email from Erica to Ellie:

That's cute!  It's really good advice, too.  Works for me anyway :)

Video

Video

On Overcast Days

On overcast days
when each twig is distinct
against an underbelly sky,
when a tree is a weed
crowding out the others,
thirstily sucking minerals 
up and away,
to feed stone cold life,
to crowd the others out
on another day,
and cars throw up mud
and two people are fighting
at a bus stop –

I know
in the lonely twists
of my gut,
the world I thought I knew,
where I could touch
something
where we knew
one another
and where anyone could love
anything,
is a mirage fading
past the rain.

Then some metaphysical speck
of my mechanical mind
resists:
some strange neurons
stop and listen
against all odds,
small heads tilted to the left
as the sound of protest
works up through the blood
in hot turbulence traveling,
sparking them to flame and fire,
so that I know better:

Thanks to that part of me
I remember a dream:
Two alien purple plants
half anemone, half tree
each alone
on two towering sand-tops facing –
somehow facing without faces –
one another,
long branch arms waving,
greeting, longing to touch.
Unable to touch (of course)
but listing inward,
they create in the space between
a something real
even before the violet
sprouts in the valley.

I believe
anything human, perhaps even
anything animal
or plant, or even
the water, which is moving,
and the always precious stones –
for who is to say
the mountains lean not
away from the wind
but into one another,
great and lumbering shoulders
closer in companionship –
we share this dream.

The wild faith
is manifest
in the ranges,
in the flocks,
in the herds,
in the churches,
in the nations,
in the families we make.
We hold one another,
and we hold this up
as evidence.

But the tangible
is not what matters.
Or rather it is unnecessary
to prove it. The shared dream
is at the root of it all,
the thought is between us,
and, though unfathomable,
it is also
a something real.

Video

What I Learned From My Father

Email from Ellie to Faffy:

hey pop!

been reading lots of poetry lately, found some "nature poets" i REALLY like -- wendell berry and mary oliver. got me in a poetry mood. i wrote something about/for you, but be forewarned i wrote it all today so its not perfect and will probably undergo some revisions!

What I Learned From My Father

I admit it.

I was a petulant and greedy child,

wanting more attention and

also wanting more things,

in particular wanting

more than my sister had.

I always wanted more

of my father’s praise,

which is not to say there was not enough.

I always had a sense of worth.

My father taught me the words

“dingleberry” and “flatus,”

and how to be silly.

He named for me

many things: lightning bugs,

wiffle balls, vanilla cones,

and pointed out the names of sailboats.

Ours was Pegasus.

I think of him when I see

handmade playhouses, or hear

the sound of windchimes, or

a southern accent, or

the phrase “run aground.”

He explained what it means

to be an atheist.

He taught me to feel peaceful

when I look at a tree, and that

helped me feel the prayer

of leafy limbs stretched upward.

My father taught me

to “pick a little, eat a little”

of vine-warm blackberries,

and of cobbler’s bursting tang.

That a day is not wasted,

wandering and meandering

through the woods.

He taught me that imagination could create

Herman the Ant at bedtime.

He taught me the casual joy of art, that

it is allowed

to bring out the rarely used and imperfect

talent. Once a year, maybe,

he would bring out his “real” art supplies.

He made us Mickey Mouse pancakes,

snowmen and fir trees painted

on the windows at Christmas.

We spent hours on his father’s lawn,

banging croquet balls through wickets.

I learned the wicked glee

of shooting an opponent’s ball off-course.

My father taught me how to compete,

and how to play.

How to be a bear

for your children to ride on, and

how to give good bear hugs

when the growls get too scary.

He taught me to have high standards.

To do extra homework.

My father learned from his father

what it means to be honest,

when it is the right thing to do,

why to do it.

My father taught me,

with his stable of bikes

with studded tires and pogies, to

be prepared to be adventurous.

I learned that pride is

what I feel when

I think about him.

He taught me what is valuable.

He always wanted

handmade gifts (or none at all).

He taught me patience and true love –

loving when you don’t want to,

when they might not deserve it,

when she’s pulling her sister’s hair.

He gave me the gift of pessimism,

and a sense of futility.

I remember I was frightened at first

when I saw the familiar face crack, eyes wet,

reading a poem about the passage of time.

Pondering what may come, and

what is certain to come,

he taught me to share his awareness

of what we once had –

when we were little,

before Aunt Betty died –

and what we have now

to lose.

I picture his shoulders bowing with weight

I wish I could carry for him,

but his thoughts are still

heavy and mysterious,

I still feel a sapling to his oak.

I have added to that weight

in the past, I have disappointed him.

I have complained

that we are not close,

that our relationship feels fragile, sometimes,

that we are not who I want us to be.

It is a nameless frustration,

a nameless need unmet.

I still can’t find the words

to strengthen us or even

to acknowledge it or even

to tell him how I love him,

that I admire him,

how much I miss him even

though I never say it.

But this, I know:

when I look at my son and

I see my father,

it is my turn

for wet eyes and pondering, and

I want it to be true.

Collecting children’s books,

I try to find every one

he ever read to me, and

I try to remember

every story he ever told

so I can retell it all

to my son.

Email from Faffy to Ellie:

Ellie,

I am touched, truly, by your poem and by the tears in my eyes.  Thank you.  Having a child is one of life's most profound experiences.  Don't you agree?

Love, Pop

Email from Ellie to Faffy:

definitely agree... having a child is amazing. to be more precise, having a THEO is amazing. :)

and im really glad that you were touched!

love,

ellie


Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:

Oh.My.God. I just read your poem and I still have tears in my eyes and on my cheeks. I think it's absolutely beautiful. It should be shared. I'm curious to know if other people, who don't share our life experiences, would find meaning in it. I'll bet they will, if you share it. But I am so proud and amazed to know that something so beautiful, so meaningful, can spring from our own flesh and blood. 

We love you, even when (actually partly because) you write poetry that makes us cry.

Mama

PS I don't ever want to see a poem that describes me. haha.

Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey):

aww, im really glad that it meant so much to you guys. its hard to know sometimes, especially when its 2:30am! :)

um... why dont you want to see a poem that describes you?

i gots big love for you too you know. :)

love,

ellie

Email from Mom (Monkey) to Ellie:

I know you do. But I'm afraid it would describe my prickly, nagging, yelling, angry interactions with my kids. It'd be funny though. I'm the disciplinarian, the organizer, the hardass--hard to get teary-eyed and wistful about that sort of person!

But the one good thing about me is that I picked the best father for my kids possible. 

Love you

Mama

Email from Ellie to Mom (Monkey):

you're dead-wrong, mom. that is NOT the first thing i think about when i think of you. and i have just as many fond memories and reasons i love you as i do for pop.

im GLAD that we've had angry interactions -- well, glad that we communicate, anyway. it can be hard for me to talk to pop.

and i get teary-eyed thinking about how much i love you, too.

my relationship with pop (and with you) is far from perfect... but thats not what love is about!